Dear Santa

Dear Santa,

I feel I have been a good girl this year. I have kept to some of my new years resolutions and I have committed many selfless acts and I feel that the great cosmos has repaid me greatly for my generosity already.

As a family I think we have accomplished a lot and reaped the rewards of working very hard. I'm quite fortunate that I dont need anything this year. I will not freeze if I don't get a new coat, nor will I have no footwear if I do not get new boots.

Obviously there are always things that we think we need in our lives however, this year I am feeling very lucky to have what I already have. It's always nice to receive a gift of jewellery or perfume but this year I will not be asking for material objects.

This year, Santa, I feel I need a bit of Christmas magic. Not directly for me, but for my family. I know I will benefit from their happiness by default but I am asking that this year you put their needs before mine.

The things I would like some help with are:

*some help for T with his toileting. I feel any improvement in this will greatly improve his self esteem.
*please continue to assist him also with his literacy. He has had a slow and un-motivated start but he will get there.
*please help big J to stay 'dry'. He has done tremendously well since May. I know this is a daily struggle for him so please, please continue to guide him away from this evil.
*help J to stay calm and enjoy this family of ours. It's bloody hard work but the rewards are fantastic, even if he rarely sees them as he is working.
*please continue to let V blossom. She is already a remarkable little lady who I am in awe of everyday.
*as ever with little J, I am a little stumped in what to ask for, he is a wonderfully bright little boy and an amazing little person to be around. Perhaps guide him safely through the transition to school in September and help him settle in well.

And if you really must give me a gift; please remind me to count my blessings, every, single day. Give me patience, and allow me to show my children how much I love them and that they are my entire world. More time is something I will never have so please help me to make the best of the time I already have.

I think that's it. I'm not good at stuff like this, so I hope you won't mind the abrupt signing off. You see, I'm trying very hard to get out of this year as quickly as possible, as this is definitely the year that nearly broke me but I am still trying very hard.

I look forward to your visit on Christmas eve and I promise we will leave a clear route for the reindeer to guide them down. (it's edible this year too so they can refuel whilst you make your stop.) We will leave mince pies and a glass of milk as ever and we will toast you with lemonade at our Christmas meal.

Thank you for reading my letter and I shall sign off so you can start getting ready to check your nice list again. I hope I'm on it.

Yours

Danielle x

It is starting to feel a bit like Christmas

This post is about nothing but documenting my little family getting ready for the festivities and giving you all the chance to be a bit nosy!

I don't profess to be über mum and have everything purchased, wrapped, written and premade and frozen by the 1st week of advent. I am more of a dribs and drabs kind of mum.

Years gone by have taught me that the mad dash to buy everything following the last payday before Christmas day (usually Christmas eve) is not good for my health or my marriage!

So this year, I once again vow to be a little more organised and get everything ready early, ish.

I have to say I am rather proud of my efforts so far. I have purchased most if not all the gifts for the children, spent ages reorganising hidey-holes to put them so as not to ruin the illusion of the big red man, I have also bought some gifts for Mr Bean and there may even still be a surprise or two! The food, well apart from grabbing the odd BOGOF, I have ordered the turkey and I've made a cake.

However, there are (finally) some decorations up. We have even spent time making some!

And so the house is starting to feel a teensy bit Christmassy and the children's excitement can at last begin to build.

Oh and I have started to write the Christmas cards too.

To Kindle or not to Kindle?

Ok, for any of you that have read my previous post Ghost of Christmas Past, I feel a follow up is definitely in order.

From that post it was clearly evident that I was pretty unimpressed with my husbands Christmas gift of choice for me and as I receive the first of my Christmas stock for this year it has inspired me to reflect on the gifts we gave and received last year.

Leading up to Christmas 2009, the 'e-Reader' was launched and my husband, the gadget FREAK, asked me if I would want one. My response was a flat "No".

For those of you that have not read my Ghost of Christmas Past article my reasons for the resounding were as follows;

• I'm a big book reader and I love a Book
• the touch
• smell
• sense of "how much have I read" or "how much is left"
• chapters
• page turning
• and perhaps the smallest of reasons, I get eye strain from reading on the PC/laptop/mobile phone.

In retrospect, perhaps I shouldn't have judged the book by its cover (for want of a better expression!). I have given my Kindle a good 7 months of use and the operative word there is USE.

I have used it. Well, I haven't just used it it has become my bedtime companion EVERY night. I am ashamed to say (based on my highly ungrateful and emotional reaction to the prospect of receiving it) that I love it. I cannot imagine my life without one.

Lets look at the pros

1. Luckily for me, my husband thought ahead to the logistics of my reading in bed (the only time I get a chance to read anything), of a night and sussed that he would not like a light on for the duration so he bought me a lovely leather case with a light that is powered by the Kindle itself. The light can be pulled out to be on or tucked away when reading in daylight. I think the case with the little light was about £50, which is expensive BUT my case still looks new, it is REAL leather and of course there is the added wonder of the little light. There are obviously cheaper alternatives available.
2. Added bonus of the case protecting the Kindle itself - although this does make it bulkier to carry around. (I am a mum though so small handbags are not my thing)
3. The Whispernet. What an awesome invention! There is nothing more frustrating than sitting watching a loading screen waiting for a download to finish. Not being able to switch the device off until it is finished or just waiting in anticipation of the book, song, programme you are downloading. Amazon you have this sussed 'cos this is fast, effective and fan-bloomin-tastic. Everything is delivered in seconds from the Kindle store.
4. Ah the Kindle store! Easy to navigate, easy to find what you are looking for and it's a clever little invention that links to your amazon account giving you access to recommendations and your wish list!
5. Free eBooks. Now I couldn't talk about this wondrous little contraption without mentioning that (we all love something for nothing) that there is a whole wealth of literature that can be downloaded FREE. Yes, FREE. There is a whole list of books on a whole range of subjects that are FREE to anyone that wants them and there is a "Top 100" list of the most popular ones.
6. Storage. It stores all your 'current reads' or 'want to reads' in one place. Bye bye to the pile of books down the side of my bed that gathers dust!
7. Auto Switch Off. I often fall asleep when reading. It is the one thing guaranteed to send me into the land of nod when I am struggling with my insomniac tendencies and the blissful element of my Kindle is that it switched off after a period of non activity. A highly economical feature if you ask me. Time saving too as I don't have to wait to recharge everyday.
8. Battery Life. I charge mine about once a week, if that. It largely depends how much I download or how long I read for. The battery lasts longer if you switch the wireless connection off after downloading a whole library of new reads (I can NEVER just download one book!)
9. WiFi. This wonderful little library package is easily connected to WiFi. It disconnects when you want it to and reconnect pretty damn quickly.
10. Size. I know I have touched on this above with the case and all, but when not in its protective case I genuinely could see this slipping into my handbag or briefcase on a daily commute. With its case, which is a must have for me as it gets chucked in the bottom of my changing bag and the light is invaluable, it is well protected and would last a long haul journey in a suitcase. Although quite why you would pack it and not read it on a flight I do not know.
11. It is great for KIDS! I have a lot of children's classics (all of mine have been downloaded FREE) to hand all the time which I can call on to keep MissBean occupied while waiting for her brothers to do swimming lessons. I can also see that when BigBean is older and can read, I will buy him his own one to read to encourage this invaluable life skill.
12. Finally and perhaps the most important point. I have read from this little baby for hours on end, when I am already tired, in bright sunlight and in the dark (with help from the book light) and I can honestly say I have never suffered from any kind of eye strain whatsoever! It is really easy to read from this screen and I applaud Amazon for their technological development to make this the case.

I have quickly discovered that in this technology driven world, that time to sit and read a book is perhaps becoming more and more of a luxury. I simply don't have the time to do it apart from a few minutes before I fall asleep of a night.

Having this versatile little contraption to hand has made a big difference in my life albeit very subtly and mostly without me noticing, but it has given me back time and more opportunity to indulge in a much loved hobby. It has also opened up availability of a lot of literature that I may have missed on my reading journey.

There you have it. I am converted. Long live the Kindle!

As a footnote, I would like to add that I have not effectively made use of the annotation or highlighting facilities which is why I have not included them in my review above.

I would also like to add that I have not been asked to review this product, it is something that I felt that I needed to share.

Ghost of Christmas past...

Right. Here I go being a complete selfish bitch again!

A (very) long time ago I was in a (forbidden) relationship (marriage) to my ex. We were totally wrong for each other in so many ways. All celebrations came and went with very little thought going into my gifts yet somehow he always managed to get them right.

Absolutely spot on. Every time (irritatingly).

I really do not think of him much often but we were together for 7 years so he has left an imprint on my life and my relationship abilities.

He never failed to surprise me when it came to gifts. They ranged from the extravagant (jewelery, holidays and the like) to the small (intimate details were never overlooked, my favourite perfume that I was running out of, new underwear, another addition to my Winnie the Pooh collection etc etc. the list goes on.)

Anyway. Due to (oh soooo) many reasons. We parted company.

Ever since I have never met another male who has been able to match his gift buying abilities.

I question whether Mr Ex was particularly good at buying gifts for me to make up for his complete balls up in every other capacity in our relationship. Alas, I digress.

With Christmas coming I have been very careful to detail to my (crap at buying gifts) husband EXACTLY what I would like to unwrap come the big day. I know we don't have a lot of money and I have explicitly explained that I only expect to receive the one gift from him and the children as a collective. I even emailed him the link to the website that sells them. Not because I am totally unreasonable, ungrateful for any other gift he may buy, but because it is something that I really need. Something that I would have liked a long time ago, however it is a replacement to something I have already had and I have been patient and waited until my old one is dying a slow death. Overall, I have learnt my lesson. Hints just do not work...!

Last night, my husband made a big deal about borrowing my laptop and ordering me a gift from him. (So I already know that he hasn't listened.) I hoped that perhaps he had been super diligent and found them cheaper elsewhere or got a good deal or maybe even had a secret stash of money that I hadn't known about and could afford to buy me more than one gift. He was pleased as punch with himself. He is the man that runs out on my birthday to pick up a card and a gift (if I'm lucky!) and the guy that is frantically buying whatever is left for Christmas or Mothering Sunday. I even can't remember the last time he bought me a Valentines card.

I have just discovered what he has bought me. (My hubby is RUBBISH at keeping secrets and has dropped hints all over the place. He also stupidly ordered it on my amazon account and they sent me a confirmation email....Had I not purchased items from them which I am waiting delivery I probably would not have opened the email. School boy error.)

Regardless...

My hubby has bought me something that I really do not want. We had a conversation about the item last Christmas and I explained my reasons for not wanting one quite explicitly.

I can almost understand the logic behind him purchasing one of these for me:

He knows how much I love to read. However, when I explained last year my reasons for not wanting one, I thought I had been quite specific. I love the touch, smell and feel of a real book.

I admit I don't like surprises, for this specific reason; I don't like to disappoint the person who has given the gift. Especially when they will be jumping around like a puppy, giddy with enthusiasm at the anticipation.

He is the gadget man. He has the iPhone, iPhone4, several iPods, BluRay players, HMDI TV, Wii, laptop, Sky+ HD, PSP, DSi etc. He loves a gadget. Anything that takes the effort out of doing, viewing, seeing his entertainment and invariably makes his life easier. He already has his eyes on the next range of TV's we will have to buy to fulfil his gadgetry needs.

I don't mind these items. It keeps him out of my way when I need to get on with stuff. I'm just not overwhelmed by them (until it comes to being able to function any of them when he is out of the house!)
I really am just not that kind of person. It broke my heart to actually purchase and use a sewing machine this year to undertake my sewing and mending jobs that I would love to have the time to do (meticulously) by hand. I just didn't have the time so I gave in.

I like old fashioned things. I like needlecraft's and reading and enjoy them far more than any of the various entertainment contraptions he has in the house. I like the piece and quiet of undertaking my hobbies and the immense satisfaction I get when I complete a project or book.

He just doesn't get it. He cannot understand why I wouldn't want a machine to read a book for me. He probably thinks that it will make his life easier as he won't have to store (yet more) books in his beloved "clean lined" house. I fear he just doesn't get me. Which leaves me reflecting on the way things were.

I like a little bit of homely clutter. If I had my own way (and a spare room!) I'd put bookshelves in there and a comfy chair with a knitting box and I would be in my element.

I wish he could understand the total enjoyment I get from reading a book. In the 5 years we have been together, he has only ever read one book (The DaVinci Code). It was a good book. I read it too. I also jumped on the opportunity to buy him the other 3 books Dan Brown had written at the time with a longing for him to reap the rewards of the written word too. He has never picked any of them up.

Have we really come to a point in society where a real book is dead unless it can be uploaded onto a gadget that will deteriorate our eyesight more so that reading an actual book?

Is it too much to expect the man in my life to know me well enough to appreciate my interests? Or even listen to me when I ask for a specific gift?

I am very happy with my man for the most part. He is my world and he gave me my 3 very beautiful children. I am now worrying with vigour how I gently explain to him my disappointment when the big day comes.